RANT - Mission Chinese Food

One of these days I'll meet local restaurant critic Joel Bauer in a bar and have a real good argument with him.

I'll start by saying "what on earth were you thinking when you gave such ridiculously high praise to that dive Mission Chinese Food and its greasy selection of overly-spiced trash food?"

Alright, that doesn't sound like much of an argument starter does it? I'll have to throw in a bit more vitriol. 

I can't believe the gulf between the fulsome reviews given to the food this place turns out and the reality.

Tonight we had the Hainam Chicken, Thrice-Cooked Bacon, Mongolian Long Beans, Sizzling Cumin Lamb, and Smoked Beef Brisket Soup Noodles, and every dish was too greasy, and too spicy. For me, the lamb was inedible - just a hunk of overly tough and fatty meat. Nasty. As were all of the dishes.

Admittedly, it's a somewhat different take on Chinese food, even if it's another Americanized version. On first encounter it's as much Indian or Thai as it is Chinese, with lots of chili pods and oil.

In one of those strange scenarios I've only encountered in San Francisco, although it may be true all over the world, this Chinese restaurant has no Chinese chefs. The owner and chef is Korean, and had never cooked Chinese food until he decided to feature this cuisine in the Mission. That accounts for the "different take", but doesn't excuse the oily nature of every dish.

This place will not be seeing us again.